wenk.

2004-09-27T10:23:00.000+08:00

this blog has moved.

2004-09-27T06:29:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:More Than Anyone/Gavin DeGraw.

lots of things have happened since my last post. lots and lots. things have changed. new thoughts and issues have come up. more particles of confusion have entered the world, and have decided to hover themselves over me.

however, i dont wan't to tell you everything. so i'll tell you... some.

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if you're observant enough, you'll realize that i've been listening to the same song over and over and over and over again since three posts ago. i don't think i could get this addicted to a song, but apparently, i can. it is a nice song. it really, really is. now if only i had someone to sing it to. or to dedicate it to.

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friday. chocolate buffet at manila peninsula with paul, pj, melai and albert. eat-all-you-can-chocolate for P500. yummy at first, revolting by the end of the third hour. all in all, it was a fun, once-in-a-lifetime experience. watching melai so sleepy (yet so greedy for chocolate), that she was already half asleep, munching on chocolate with her eyes closed. also, we were getting so hyper that we had to walk off all the chocolate we were eating every 30 minutes. we were there for three and half hours... and i didn't even get to try the cakes. chocolate. chocolate. chocolate. can you say fattening?. (sorry melai, pix to come!)

saturday. i finally bought the sims 2. an original copy. P1,395. the first original pc game i ever bought for myself. (actually, i still owe my brother P400 because i was short of cash). damnit, it's the best investment i've ever made... and, it comes with a free pillow! needless to say, i was pretty much home all day. ooh. had free greenwich pasta and "coffee" with ilse, too. salamat.

sunday. dlsu-feu (basketball) game 2. we lost, darn it. i swear, i wanted to cry. actually, i really, really almost did cry. i wanted our team to win soooo badly. the green archers really do deserve it. you don't know how inspiring it is to see araneta coliseum be 70% dlsu. school spirit was there---even when we lost. i'm sure the dlsu crowd went home from that stadium without a voice today. however, today made me realize that i really, really love my school---hello, everyone knows how much i love my school. but i love it even more today. i do. i do. i do. besides, we'll get them on thursday. we will. we will. we will.

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it was a strangely eventful weekend. however, today--sunday, i end it depressed.

maybe because we lost today. maybe because i know i have a crapload of schoolwork to do for this week. maybe because i'm confused about a lot of things. maybe because i have too many secrets stored inside of me and just about filled to the brim with them. maybe because of something else.

who knows?

2004-09-23T07:21:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:More Than Anyone/Gavin DeGraw.

please don't ask me why i'm posting this... but your honest answers will be most appreciated. salamat.

Tell me three things:

(1) something you know about me.
(2) something you like about me.
(3) something you'd want to share with me.

2004-09-23T07:13:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:More Than Anyone/Gavin DeGraw.

i found my official 2nd favorite song (after greatest story ever told). or maybe 3rd. or 4th. basta. it's in my top 10.

a big, big thank you to yogi for introducing it to me.

the sad part is... this goes out to nobody.

download it. unbelievable.

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More Than Anyone - Gavin DeGraw.

You need a friend
I'll be around
Don't let this end
Before I see you again
What can I say to convince you
To change your mind of me?
I'm going to love you more than anyone
I'm going to hold you closer than before
And when I kiss your soul, your body'll be free
I'll be free for you anytime
I'm going to love you more than anyone
Look in my eyes, what do you see?
Not just the color
Look inside of me
Tell me all you need and I will try
I will try
I'm going to love you more than anyone
I'm going to hold you closer than before
And when I kiss your soul, your body'll be free
I'll be free for you anytime
I'm going to love you more than anyone
Free for you, whenever you need
We'll be free together baby
Free together baby
I'm going to love you more than anyone
I'm going to hold you closer than before
And when I kiss your soul, your body'll be free
I'll be free for you anytime
I'm going to love you more than anyone
I'm going to love you more than anyone.

2004-09-20T07:43:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:the Lasalle cheers going round & round in my head.

tonight...

i have no voice.
my body is sore from all the jumping.
my right arm is longer than the left (because that's the arm i cheered with).
my hands are swollen (i swear on my life)--from all the clapping and high-fives.

but i swear, that was one fantastic game.

my favorite part (asides from cheering my lungs out, silenced ateneans, winning and just being there), was during the halftime presentation when the DLSU squad was joined by the pep squads of DLSZ, LSGH and CSB.

guuuhhraaaabe.

guhrabe talaga.

i am so friggin' impressed with the tremendous improvement in DLSU's performance this second round. the first round was full of doubts that they would even make the final 4... who would have thought that we would now be 2-3 games away from a possible championship title?

i just want to say this: i am so proud to be a lasallian.

not just because we have a great basketball team.

because games like this remind me that we have animo. and i really believe that the amount of school spirit that we have is sure to take us far.

very, very far.

more of vic's pictures here.

ANIMO LASALLE!!!

2004-09-17T06:03:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:I Don't Know How To Let You Go/Sarah McLachlan.

i want to blog, but don't really have anything specific to blog about... so let me tell you the thoughts running around in my head.

*i lined up for 2 hours today, and now my daddy-o and i have 2 Upper B tickets to this Sunday's DLSU-ADMU game! i hope we can get better tickets though. go lasalle!

*i was supposed to watch a movie with a *very indecisive* friend today, but ended up getting free dinner instead. even better. salamat.

*at least 5 people commented today that i was an extremely hyper person. is that true? me?! hyper?! of course not!!!

*i love my friends. i really, really do.

*i want to buy a cake for myself. not just a slice of cake, an entire cake. yummmmmmy.

*i'm still waiting for a sign from God--who am i supposed to be rooting for on The Amazing Race? chip and kim, brandon and nicole, or linda and karen? i'm so stressed!

*mela's going to hongkong tomorrow. *jealous* i hope i get really, really nice pasalubong. hint, hint.

*i've been singing this one line from a song that i keep hearing on the radio, but i have no idea what the title of the song is or who sang it. the line goes "i'm not going anywhere". nice no? (imagine that the tune is really, really nice!).

*on cool, rainy days like this, i really wish that... errr... i don't know what to wish for exactly. i just feel like wishing for something. malamig eh.

ummmm.

the end.

2004-09-16T05:29:00.000+08:00

you know what i love the most about watching UAAP basketball games? (asides from the time with my dad, the occasional free dinner afterwards and the unbelievable amount of school spirit).

when lasalle silences the ateneans...

and makes them pikon.

really, really pikon.

final score of yesterday's lasalle - ateneo game: 82-69.

see more fantabulous picture taken by my brother over here.

ugh.

2004-09-12T13:21:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:Greatest Story Ever Told/Oliver James.

and if i lived a thousand years
you know i never could explain
the way i lost my heart to you that day,
but if destiny decided i should look the other way,
then the world would never know
the greatest story ever told.

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my ramblings. forgive me.

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i am a huge mess of emotions right now and i can't seem to identify all of them. i'm sad, confused, angry, lonely, anxious, worried... the list goes on.

i'm drowning in this gigantic pool of thoughts, but no one can help me out of it because i don't understand what i'm wading in either. i can't talk about it, because i don't know what to say.

i'm depressing myself listening to all these sad songs, but don't even know if i have a right or a reason to be depressed. they say i'm luckier than most, yet i don't seem to understand why. i can't explain why exactly i'm feeling this way, i just am.

i'm always in the company of the people who love me the most, the people whom i love dearly, yet i don't think i've ever felt this alone or abandoned. i should be feeling loved and content, but i'm not.

i'm mad at myself because i'm constantly dreaming of what i want to have, what i want to feel--things others seem to have such an easy time finding, but something i feel i will never have.

being loved. being accepted. being happy.

i feel so ungrateful.

blech.

2004-09-10T17:37:00.000+08:00

for those of you who don't know... (prepare for the shock of your life!)...

i am a die-hard lasallian... and part of a die-hard lasallian family. *gasp*

all 5 of us kids studied in zobel and later moved on to DLSU. my dad studied in don bosco for high school, but graduated college in DLSU. my mom...well.. nevermind. loyal din yan.

my dad and i are uaap partners. uaap games = kris + dad --ganoon lang yun. vic and cyn are also bound to be there... except with much, much better seats. *sniff*

my dad, vic, and i went to PhilSports to watch the DLSU-UE game yesterday. (my, my, what responsible family members i have... their responsibility to their alma matter is much, much greater than their responsibility to their current places of employment!)

fine, fine, back to the game...

can you say UE was superdupergrabeovertothemax tambak? also, i believe we played quite well. quite. hehe.

it was soooo great. the smallest lead we had versus UE was about 7 points and the biggest lead we got was about 20-25+ points. grabe. with a final score of 81-61, you can bet your bottom (and your bottom's bottom!) that we were very, very, very happy greenies.

and in case you can't visualize how happy we were...

hehe.

btw, pictures in this post are courtesy of my ever-so-talented-brother, vic.

animo lasalle!

2004-09-09T07:47:00.000+08:00

to all the amazing race 5 fans:

you have NO idea how happy i am.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

selfish.

2004-09-07T21:37:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:Somewhere in Between/Lifehouse.

you know one of the things i hate most about life?

you can't please everybody.

if you had a choice between making yourself happy and making someone else happy, which would you choose?

instinctively, i chose myself. i feel that i can't do a good job of making someone else happy if i'm not happy myself, diba?.

so how come some people do such a great job of making it feel so wrong? how come some people have a way of making it seem like you did the wrong thing? how could tables turn like that---and suddenly, you make me feel so selfish and self-centered, just because i want to be happy? is that so wrong?

i've explained my side.. over and over again. but you just can't seem to get it. you can't seem to understand how i feel.

yes, i care about your happiness. i've said it a million and one times, i'm so sorry for hurting you. you have no idea how much it hurts me to see you hurting.

but you don't understand me. and i don't think you ever will.

i'm sorry.

2004-09-06T05:09:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:Iris/Goo Goo Dolls.

as my friend, kate would say, i was in "heaven" for 2 days. last friday and saturday, i was in tanay, rizal (can you say "boondocks?") with green and white for our so-called "teambuilding". it was a really, really remote place, but i swear, it was sooooooooooo beautiful.

after a gruelling trimester, (oooh! ooh! i made the dean's list by the way! miracles DO happen!), this trip was exactly what i needed to de-stress myself. i experienced 2 days of cool weather, eating unbelievable amounts of food, laughing my butt off every 5 minutes, singing my heart out (hehe, especially on the bus ride home), and eating even more food.

grabe.

so to jatts, lorraine, des, amy, shendee, sheela, shayne, kellyn, ais, cindy, pam, kim, joylyn, diths, ana, jaemi, kate, marvs, lyzen, e.r., peter, jai, chris, ate anne and sir lakan--thanks for the laughs and the fantabulous weekend.

cheers! :)

(and yes, i am aware that i have a sungay from the tv antenna. hindi sadya yan).

more pictures here.

2004-09-05T06:41:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:the radio.

am looking for a good site for free image hosting and gallery-ing. please don't suggest i "google it", i swear, i've tried.

heeeeelp.

i want to post the billion pictures i have yet to upload. :(

-----

problem solved. i went back to my fotopic thingy. thanks anyway guys :).

tar5.

2004-09-02T03:11:00.000+08:00

i admit it. i am a bum.

i woke up at 2:30pm today.
i had my *cold* breakfast at 3:30pm.
i turned down watching a movie and having dinner with some friends because i was too lazy to get dressed.
i spent 2 hours downloading things for the sims, when i actually only played it for 15 minutes.

and you know how i REALLY KNOW i need to get a life?

because the most stressful decision i have to make today is...

or

who i'm rooting for on TAR5.

2004-09-01T04:33:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:Name/Goo Goo Dolls.

you know you're on sembreak when your day is pretty much like mine:

12:00nn -- wake up & lie around for awhile.
12:30pm -- have lunch. watch the dog do nothing.
01:30pm -- watch a little tv. turn on the computer. chat.
03:00pm -- walking back & forth between tv & computer. how stressful!
04:30pm -- be super tired from walking (hehe). take long nap.
06:00pm -- wake up. watch more tv.
07:00pm -- recieve a phone call. ooh! im going out tonight!
07:30pm -- shower. get dressed.
08:30pm -- outta here. yay! people. human contact. aaaaah.

doncha love it?! here's to bumhood! see ya later, alligator! :)

hungover.

2004-08-29T22:47:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:Crush/Dave Matthews Band.

oh my god. i did it. i reached this far. sembreak at last.

what better way to celebrate the start of a glorious two-week break?

only ana, chesca, gaby, aaron, earl, april, chard, abbie, anjo and i will ever know. maybe our friends, anejo, arctic, jose cuervo and tequila rose can tell you something about last night as well.

shucks. of all the times not to have my camera.

love soon.

2004-08-26T20:21:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:Love Soon/John Mayer.

last night, my family and i watched the musical "Baby", starring Lea Salonga. to be honest, i didn't like it too much (sorry mela!)--i found it dragging most of the time (maybe because i was overly sleepy from the stress of finals week), and the fact that my sisters and i were seated in row "v" didn't really make the experience all that better. (i'll give you a hint, the first row was letter "a"--you do the math).

i don't want to tell you the entire story, mainly because i cant--we didn't finish it. however, there were things that i realized from the musical. it may not have been the point they were trying to send across, but it got me thinking.

the play was about 3 couples: one couple was still in college and just got pregnant. the second couple was desperate to get pregnant, but were unable to. the third couple was in their 40's, just sent their nth kid to college, and got pregnant (again), and were deciding whether to keep the baby or not.

i was struck by the love that these couples had for each other. what really moved me was all of them had their major differences in opinion, but they stuck by each other the whole time. they were soooo in love with each other, and each of them was willing to give up what he/she wanted in order to make the other one happy.

don't get me wrong--i'm perfectly happy standing (rather, sitting) where i am now. i'm not in a hurry to get married (hello! boyfriend muna, pwede?). but watching that play, i came out of Meralco Theater sure of one thing:

one day, i want to love someone that much.

i really, really, really hope that he loves me back.

la la la...

2004-08-26T07:49:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:rain. rain. rain.

how do you know you've had a bad day?

* when you study until 3am for finama2 finals and realize that you haven't learned a single thing from the 10billion hours you studied.
* when you barely get 3 hours of sleep because you get bangungot the entire night.
* when you wake up an hour later than you wanted to.
* when you study in the library 2 hours before your test--and nothing enters your mind. at all.
* when you take the test... and it's so hard you want to cry and laugh at the same time.
* when you realize that after taking it, you were sure of exactly 4 of your answers... out of 100 questions.
* when your test was from 1030-1230.. and classes get suspended at 1pm.
* when the rain is just sooooo strong that you want to curl into bed... but have to finish (rather, start) a project due tomorrow.

sigh.

one day to go.

saturday.

2004-08-22T23:39:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:Damned/Shimoli.

saturday was definitely not an-ordinary-day for me. it was spent riding in police cars, visiting precincts, going to star city, and hanging out with people i barely know (but now love--hehe! hi kimmy and nika!) :).

i want to make kwento, but im scared i'll bore the shit out of you guys.

here's a pic of me, nika, kimmy and rowell behind bars.

more pictures here.

eternal.

2004-08-20T07:15:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:Secret Garden/Bruce Springsteen.

i was reading jj's blog and felt like posting a reflection paper on what i learned from the eternal sunshine of the spotless mind.

the movie made me realize how big an impact love plays in your life. the ultimate lesson of the movie:no matter how much the mind tries to forget, the heart never will.

in my case, this is so, so, so unbelievably true.

no matter how much time passes, no matter how many people i've met along the way--there are things and people i just can't ever forget.

there are memories that will forever be buried in my subconsciousness... memories that i don't believe can ever be erased.

there will always be things and places that will remind me of certain people--or of one particular person.

there will be times when i feel like i've moved on with my life---only to find out later that this isn't completely true.

lost love does many things to people. however, i am thankful that whether love be lost or not, at least i've experienced it. at least once in my life, i've felt what it's like to love and be loved by the same person. i've at least once in my life, been blessed with such care and undying love from a person.

i don't want to forget anything about my past. i just want to move on. i want to stop dwelling over it. i want to look at the future without thinking about the past for a while.

the love is no more. there is nothing left of that love but memories. at the rate things are going, there will never be more. but at least i will always have that "once in my life".

so thanks.

2004-08-18T08:17:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:All I've Got/17:28.

yesterday, i swore to my friends that i would give up coke and make a conscious effort to eat less so i can lose weight.

the ironic thing is... i haven't eaten this much in a day in sooooooo long.

don't believe me? let me tell you: what went inside kristine icasas' stomach today.
(and give you a sneak peek at my day as well).

late breakfast: a slice of ready-to-bake chocolate cake at home with mommy.
late lunch:a huge slice of mushroom pizza and a large (flat) coke at sbarro's with ces and albert.
merienda(20 minutes after lunch):a smokey's cheesedog and a regular coke at the movie theater watching eternal sunshine of the spotless mind (which by the way is SOOOO good!)
merienda:2 pieces of bazooka bubble gum.
dinner:2-piece burger steak and rice, 4 pieces shanghai rolls, and a large coke at jollibee with shendee, amy, jackie, albert, andrew and alvin.
merienda:a slice of ready-to-bake chocolate cake.

and just when i was feeling sooooo bad about what i had eaten today...

midnight snack: spaghetti, regular fries, and a regular coke at mcdo with my sister.
post-midnight snack: a slice of ready-to-bake chocolate cake.

HAHAHAHAHAH. days like this are just the best.

here's to food and the joy it brings!!! :)

----------------------------

My inner child is ten years old!

The adult world is pretty irrelevant to me. Whether
I'm off on my bicycle (or pony) exploring, lost
in a good book, or giggling with my best
friend, I live in a world apart, one full of
adventure and wonder and other stuff adults
don't understand.

How Old is Your Inner Child?
brought to you by Quizilla

breaks.

2004-08-16T05:39:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:Free in You/Indigo Girls.

i've never been this stressed for this long in my entire life. it's been almost a month since i've given up sleeping at acceptable hours. 3am. 4am. 2am. 5am. it's getting worse! and to think, it's not finals week yet. very near there, but not yet. that means i have to be like this for two more weeks.

but yesterday, i took a break from it all--and i was reminded that i am human, that i have friends, and there's such a thing as a weekend. it was great!

ces, mel, jackie, toni, albert & i watched a cinderella story at greenbelt. afterwards, people-watched and watched the band 17:28 play at tavern.

comments:
greenbelt3 cinema: i luuuuurve the seats. armrests go up and down pa!
hilary duff: very pretty. very.. err.. boob-y in that white dress.
chad michael murray: drop-dead-in-your-face-gorgeous.
plot: very, very, very predictable.
jackie as my seatmate: i wish i were deaf... but you know i love you anyway.
movie itself: suuuuucked!!!
arctic vodka: the next best thing after coke.
17:28:damn, you guys are GOOD.
the day as a whole: stupendous.

green and white.

2004-08-13T07:59:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:Why Georgia/John Mayer.

amidst all the papers, exams, projects, reports and other tear-causing-schoolwork, lies a group of people i have not met until recently, but have given me more than 1 reason to smile even during the worst possible days. a rather rough time in my life, im glad i have people like these to keep me going.

they make me do the unthinkable, like cut class (haha, unthinkable daw!) or stay in school until 9pm for no reason at all. they make me want to bring my camera to school just so i can take pictures of them-- so i can show off to the world one of my latest blessings.

presenting... (some of) the people of Green & White.

jai. shendz. lyzen. amy. kris. toni.

debbie. nikki. albert. shee. kris. rhoda.

what happens when your bored and have a camera? this does.

ang labo talaga ng mga tao minsan... noh?

smile!

many more pictures--> click here.

a belated post.

2004-08-11T09:05:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:Every Little Thing/Dishwalla.

last saturday, i went out with my high school friends who i haven't seen since... a long time ago. i think we've seen each other once since christmas. anyway--we went out last saturday for a fun-filled evening--grappa's, ice monster, visiting ana, coffee, and a loooooooooooot of laughs. we missed you eleanor!

theme: "It's wonderful 2be 2gether Again".
(yes, i am fully aware that the letter "A" in "Again" is wrong. i am also aware that themed gimmicks are unusual. it's a really long story.)

Chesca, Yans, Kris, Kenny and She--taking picture: Mayk.

Me and Kenny.
*this is only the 6th time (yes, we counted) he's shown his face since we graduated high school. 6 times. kenneth, mahiya ka naman.

Ches, Yans, Kenny, She, and Mayk. missing: ME!!!

more pics over here.

grabe.

It's wonderful
2b 2gether
Again.

i love you guys.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

it was a long, unproductive day. i had soooo much to do, but i didn't scratch a single item off my list... in fact, my list just kept on getting longer. oh well, there's always tomorrow.

i had dinner tonight with amethyst (who saved the little sanity i had left by wrapping up the writeup-editing season & by giving me a much needed conversation), albert (who was nice enough to repair last night's cheeseburger meal issue by feeding me one) and toni (who sponsored today's sugar fix with an eat-and-butcher-the-gummy-bears-escapade), where we ate at house blends. it was so funny. people are soooooo weird sometimes... makes me feel nice and normal. haha.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

wenk's thought of the day:

when life bombards you with bugs and insects---there's always your friends to act as your baygon. --wenkgirl.

.

2004-08-10T07:21:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:Little You and I/Jason Mraz.

my way-too-many-nights-of-sleep-deprivation are causing me emotional instability.

an example: my afternoon vs. my evening.

my afternoon at school.
i had a great afternoon, considering the stress level i'm going through. nothing fabulous, just hanging out with people who made it so easy to smile and forget about all the sh*t i'm in. in fact, i had so much fun with them that i cut my last class. loafing around, telling jokes and stories. a perfect afternoon.

my evening at home.
*we had chicken curry for dinner--i hate chicken curry. i hate it so much that i chose not to eat dinner, even if i was starving.

*i got an impressive amount of work done tonight. however, i am saddened by the sad songs playing on the radio--and now i feel empty and friendless all of a sudden. depressed over melodies. pained by song lyrics. that is just so pathetic.

*i spoke to my sister about something that i found disturbing--something people offered to do for a good cause. i was shocked at how selfish some people are--about how they don't do things out of the goodness of their heart--but do things so that they look good to the public. some people want to be given a gold medal for the good deeds they do, and that really pisses me off. the thing is, she didn't see it from my point of view. my parents sided with her as well. it sucks, because i feel so strongly about this certain issue and no one understands... argh.

*at one point this evening, i texted my brother if he could buy me a cheeseburger meal from mcdonald's on his way home from the mall--and to my surprise, he agreed. if something could cheer me up tonight, it would be a burger and a large coke. now, he comes home, two and a half hours later... as i open the door for him, he avoids my eyes and says, "oh shit, i forgot your food."

nothing earth-shattering happened tonight. but suddenly, i'm depressed. i'm frustrated. i'm disappointed.

i almost cried over a cheeseburger meal.

everything's just piling up. this is getting a bit too much.

la la la.

2004-08-09T10:03:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:Every Little Thing/Dishwalla.

i have jetlag (or as my tita would say, i have jetplug).

well, no, i don't really--i didn't go anywhere except the bathroom today. but my hours are so whacked up i might as well have gone to zimbabwe. last night (this morning, i mean), i slept at 5am. i woke up at 1pm. i took a nap again at about 4 in the afternoon and woke up at 630. now, it's 2am, and i have no idea what to do with my life--or what state im going to be in when i wake up.

anyway, i think my general mood/outlook in life is improving.

i had a stressful day, and it got even stress-ier when my computer went bonkers and i lost about 3 hours worth of this afternoon's work, as well as about 5 hours of work that i could have done today--but now have to do tomorrow, when i get the backup files.

the thing is, on a normal kris-day, i would have gone completely bezerk and cried my eyes out. i could have pulled my hair out of my head and maybe cut my ears off. but no, i told my tale of woe to a couple of friends, and that was the end of it. actually, im just about convinced that it was God's way of telling me bruha, matulog ka na--bukas ka na magpuyat.

so... what was my point? im not sure anymore. oh well. go kris! haha.

2004-08-08T12:45:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:Every Little Thing/Dishwalla.

sunday. 4:45am.

good night.

2004-08-06T08:33:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:Never Saw Blue Like That/Shawn Colvin.

when the whole world is crashing down on my shoulders...
when the amount of schoolwork to do is enough to bury me alive...
when my body no longer listens to the command "sleep"...
when i realize there's no such thing as "normal eating habits" and "normal sleeping hours"...
when my entire week has just been one extremely long day...

i become thankful for the three things that keep me sane.
yahoo messenger, coke, and chocolate cake.

here's to more of these days!

2004-08-05T06:31:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:Orange Sky/Alexi Murdoch.

currently feeling:sad.

currently trying to cheer myself up by:drinking my #th coke.

hay. just when i thought everything was going great, i experience one of those unexplainable downs that life likes to give out.

it seemed like a pretty good day at first. boring, but pleasant. saw friends. i actually went to class today. haha. whoopdeedoo. hung out at the g&w office. did nothing but irritate people until i went home.

but the rain, the loneliness, the sad songs, and the one-too-many-4am-sleeping-habits are starting to catch up on me... and suddenly, i dont feel like smiling, i dont feel like laughing.

thank God, there's coke.

2004-08-03T06:13:00.000+08:00

currently listening to: Nuevas Senoritas/Indigo Girls.

for the past couple of weeks, i've been doing nothing but correct people's grammar and spelling. no, not for fun, okay? it's a long story. anyway, i haven't been editing one or two people's grammar... i'm talking hundreds and hundreds of people.

the funny thing is, i'm unconsciously starting to edit the grammar of my friends--whether we're talking through chat or in person. tonight, i start another batch of editing, and decide to check my mail. who would have thought that i would find a FORWARDED email from a friend with the following content?

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"Well well well. Look do we have here!"

"It's a no-win-win situation."

"Burn the bridge when you get there."

"Anulled and void."

"Mute and academic."

"C'mon let's join us!"

"If worse comes to shove."

"Are you joking my leg?"

"It's not my problem anymore, it's your problem anymore."

"You can never can tell."

"Been there, been that."

"Forget it about it."

"Give him the benefit of the daw."

"It's a blessing in the sky."

"Right there and right then."

"Where'd you came from?"

"Take things first at a time."

"You're barking at the wrong dog."

"You want to have your cake and bake it too."

"First and for all."

"Now and there."

"I'm only human nature."

"The sky's the langit."

"That's what I'm talking about it."

"One of these days is not like the other."

"So far, so good, so far."

"Time is of the elements."

"In the wink of an eye."

"The feeling is actual."

"For all intense and purposes."

"I ran into some errands."

"Hi. I'm , what's yours?"

"What is the world is coming to?"

"What is the next that is?"

"Get the most of both worlds."

"Bahala na sila sa mga batman nila."

"Whatever you say so."

"Base-to-base casis."

"My answers have been prayered."

"Please me alone!"

'It's as brand as new."

"So... what's a beautiful girl like you?...."

"I can't take it anymore of this!"

"Are you sure ka na ba?"

"Can't you just cut me some slacks?"

ETO PA....

1. I couldn't care a damn!

2. What's your next class before this? (ANO DAW???!!!)

3. Nothing in this world is perfect except the word "change"

4. Can you repeat that for the second time around once more from the
top?
(ulitin natin hanggang mamatay tayo!)

5. My dad brought home a lot of hand-me-downs! (Translation: Daming
pasalubong ng tatay ko.)

6. Standard and Chartered Bank

7. I'm very iterated!!! (transalation: galit sya! haha!)

8. I'm sorry, my boss just passed away. (translation: kakadaan lang
ng
boss nya.)

9. Hello, my boss is out of town. Would you like to wait?

10. What happened after the erection of Mayon Volcano?

11. Don't touch me not!

12. Hello?... For a while, please hang yourself...

13. Its spilled milk under the bridge.

14. Don't change anything! Keep it at ease.

15. Hello McDo? Mag-i-inquire lang ako kung magkano ang kidney meal?
(yung pang-batang pagkain)

16. You!!! You're not a boy anymore! You're a man anymore! (coach?!
coach?!)

17. Out of fit ako these days eh... (translation: di sya
nakakapag-exercise)

18. Come, lets join us!

19. Bring down the house down!

20. I'm the world champion of the World!!!

21. Beneath the Belt!

22. Rule of Hand... (thumb yata ibig sabihin...)

23. Can you repeat it once again?

24. Mukhang haggard-looking.

25. Do you have more brighter ideas?

26. Halatang obvious naman yata.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

labo.

three months.

2004-08-01T07:59:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:Only Hope/Switchfoot.

for some strange reason, people have been commenting over the last two days that i'm a very optimistic person. not just one person, not just two... but enough to seriously freak me out.

the funny thing is, i don't remember ever being called optimistic in my life.

exactly three months ago, things were still completely different. three months ago, I was completely different. three months ago, i didn't imagine i could realize as much about myself as i have.

i've been doing okay, and i'm proud of myself.

i can honestly, honestly say that no matter how stressful my life has been over the past couple of weeks, i've dealt with it well. i don't let things get to me as much as i used to. i'm stressed, but i can manage to cry tears of happiness sometimes--even if it's just over a dumb joke. i manage to laugh, and forget about my worries.

three months ago, i was confused. i was hurt. i was torn. torn between the present and the future.

and the future seems brighter now. and for the days that came before "three months ago", i will forever be thankful, because it made me who i am today.

little blessings.

2004-07-31T08:43:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:swept away/paolo santos.

there are some people in the world who just naturally make you happy. family, blockmates, new found friends... there are people who have such a humongous impact on your mood, that it doesn't matter if you see them everyday or once a year. if you see them and talk to them a while... *kaboom*. everything is okay. the frowns and worries are erased.

everywhere i go, i see people i love, and who (hopefully) love me back. i'm lucky to have so many of these "magical" people in my life. people who make waking up worthwhile. people who make going to school fun. people who make you look forward to going home. people who make life worth living.

life is good.

why.

2004-07-29T23:16:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:why georgia/john mayer

it's one of those days where i feel so many emotions but i don't know how to blog them out. i'm happy, but i'm sad. it's hard to explain why though. strange.

it was a good day, believe it or not. i've been starting to have a lot of "good days". finally. i'm beginning to heal.

anyway, one of my all-time favorite singers with one of my all-time favorite songs.

bow.

John Mayer - - Why Georgia

I am driving up 85 in the
Kind of morning that lasts all afternoon
just stuck inside the gloom
4 more exits to my apartment but
I am tempted to keep the car in drive
And leave it all behind

Cause I wonder sometimes
About the outcome
Of a still verdictless life

Am I living it right?
Am I living it right?
Am I living it right?
Why Georgia, why?

I rent a room and I fill the spaces with
Wood in places to make it feel like home
But all I feel's alone
It might be a quarter life crisis
Or just the stirring in my soul

Either way I wonder sometimes
About the outcome
Of a still verdictless life

Am I living it right?
Am I living it right?
Am I living it right?
Why Georgia, why?

So what, so I've got a smile on
But it's hiding the quiet superstitions in my head
Don't believe me
When I say I've got it down

Everybody is just a stranger but
That's the danger in going my own way
I guess it's the price I have to pay
Still "everything happens for a reason"
Is no reason not to ask myself

If I am living it right
Am I living it right?
Am I living it right?
Why Georgia, why?

blech.

2004-07-28T05:07:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:Never Saw Blue Like That/Shawn Colvin.

most people usually see me as a happy person. actually, not just usually. they think of me as a happy person, period. most of my friends at least.

the thing is... a lot of the time, im not. i get depressed over things like songs and love stories. i get depressed when i see happy couples who are just so in love. i get depressed when i watch romantic movies.. but i watch them anyway, because i love how they happen. maybe because one day, i hope that i get a fairytale ending as well.

i'm saddened by things i wish would happen to me, but never will. im frustrated at myself for the things i can't do. im frustrated about things that will never happen to me. i'm frustrated about things i can't have.

as melai would say,"sana i find my peter parker". sana i find the one who can just... make life perfect. sana.

sana.

blessed.

2004-07-27T06:51:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:sway/bic runga.

i don't usually like to post about my day in detail, since i don't think it's anything bloggable. i mean, you have your own day--why read about mine?

but today, God proved Himself present in my life once again.

believe it or not, i was in school for a whopping twelve hours. i started my day with a to-do-list that would bring anyone to tears.

*i had a group presentation that was not talked about yet, so we agreed to meet an hour before class to plan.

*i had a quiz in markad1, about something that i knew nothing about--i didnt even have notes.

*i had a quiz in jprizal, a subject so simple, yet horribly difficult for me to pass. i needed a good score to make up for my failed ones earlier in the term.

*i had to go to the library in order to research for articles for finama2, due tomorrow. these articles give you plus points at the end of the term--and these points are really badly needed.

*i had to edit about a billion more write-ups (im on the yearbook staff), and most of them had corrupt diskettes, and so i had to type them up manually. then edit them. deadline is tomorrow.

*i yet had to find a way home today. i knew i had to go home at 9pm (when the yearbook office closes) to finish editing, but i didn't know a single person who ended class at this time.

well.

this is how my day actually went:

*i was masungit at first, because all my groupmates were late. but lo and behold, we pulled off the crammed presentation. not bad, for something that only took us 10 minutes to plan.

*my quiz in markad1 was cancelled. moved to next week. hallelujah.

*my quiz in jprizal wasn't as bad as i expected it to be. i think i actually passed.

*jackie took pity on me and my stressful day, so she went to the library and researched for me. sweetheart.

*i did an enormous bulk of work today. the best part is, amy moved the deadline to the 30th. i have the rest of the week. oh my god. i can actually sleep and eat.

*although i was super, duper hiya, i asked, because i was desperate. brian picked me up all the way from alabang. i normally would be totally indebted to someone who was willing to drive all the way from alabang to taft just to give me a ride home, but he was listening to halikinu radio all the way home, so all you get is a huge thanks.

not to mention, i got added bonuses:
*i passed my jprizal midterm (79%), which i really, really, really believed i failed.
*all my stress only allowed me to eat one meal the whole day. yay, baka payat na ako tomorrow!
*my foul mood got me a lot of hugs from friends.
*my day just proved to me how blessed i am to have such great friends.

aaaaah.

sabado nights.

2004-07-25T07:35:00.000+08:00

currently listening to: the silent humming of the air conditioner.

people enjoy saturdays in many different ways. some by going clubbing--dancing the night away. some people choose to go to parties and be seen. some people choose to drink and watch each other get drunk. some people choose to read a book or watch tv. some people choose to finish up their assignments (haha, not me!) and prepare for another week of work or school.

today, i chose spending an hour with an old friend, driving around (with the gas light persistently screaming out 'feed me!'). so what if 3/4 of the time was spent by him parking in front of different restaurants and changing his mind? worth it naman eh, kasi he ate a candy wrapper by mistake! (HAHA!). nothing beats eating ice cream by a park. a haunted one, or so he says. (the park, not the ice cream).

that's about it. corny jokes, driving around, ice cream, nice weather, and an old friend.

heaven.

so thanks.

blessings.

2004-07-22T07:57:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:never saw blue like that/shawn colvin.

today, i was reminded of the fact that blessings come in all forms.

God makes his presence known in both big and small ways.

He is in my family. He is in my friends. He is in each can of coke i drink. He is in the rain that falls on my face. He is in the smiles and laughter. He is in the hugs. He is in the accomplishments. He is in the disappointments. He is everywhere.

for the past 67 days, i have been wondering if i made the right decision.

today, i am 100% sure that i did the right thing. today, i realized that i have the strength to move on with my life.

because He is there for me...

and always will be.

2004-07-19T09:44:00.000+08:00

currently listening to: my head pounding.

current time: 1.44am.
mission:finish (actually,start)studying for tomorrow's finama2 exam.
status: 11.9%.
mood: defeated.

- - - - -

update. 2:14am
chatting with brian. dork, keeping me glued to the pc. tsk tsk.

- - - - -

newsflash. 3:37am
going to turn off the pc now. really.

thanks bri. you're a fun one*.

proudly lasallian.

2004-07-19T05:17:00.000+08:00

i think we've done more than 'redeem' ourselves over that horrible loss against the blue team. d*mn it. i love my school.

DLSU 69. FEU 54.

ANIMO LA SALLE!!!

2004-07-18T22:19:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:gary valenciano singing some song from his new puppet show thingy.

i was kind of down last night. something about friends and getting too involved in their lives. ah basta. it's a long story.

vince and hofi saved me. a late night snack at pancake house and a road trip to tagaytay was exactly what i needed. thank you for reminding me that nothing beats old songs, fresh air and laughter. nothing beats getting away from all the mess you've left behind--even for a couple of hours.

nothing beats being with old friends.

salamat.

2004-07-15T19:10:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:Kung Okay Lang Sayo/True Faith.

did you ever experience those days where nothing spectacular happens, but you're high on life?

well. no matter how much i complain about anything and everything, i am thankful. i am loved. i am happy.

randomness.

2004-07-12T22:20:00.000+08:00

last night, i slept for:2 hours.

am watching for the love of the game on star movies. i haven't seen this movie in years, but i just remembered how much i love this one. (and how much i love kevin costner--hehe).

anyway, this is my ultimate favorite sound byte from the movie:

when you feel like life is slamming you down.. it's actually giving you a gift .

animo.

2004-07-11T22:38:00.000+08:00

Congrats to the Blue.
day: sunday.
time: 10:36pm

i have no voice. my shoes are horribly sticky from god-knows-what-was-on-the-araneta-floor. my arms and legs are tired from cheering and jumping. my phone inbox is full of text messages from gloating ateneans. my ego is deflated. i have a midterm at 9am i really must pass, yet i have not begun studying because im just too tired.

but you know what? i don't care. i don't care im tired. i don't care i'm going to cram tonight. i don't care we lost.

today, i got to witness a superb game live. i experienced 3 wonderful quarters of leading up to 14 points against ateneo. i was amidst a beautiful sea of green. i did lots and lots and lots of screaming, jumping and flailing my arms around. i had an afternoon cheering my lungs out alongside my dad and my sister-in-law. for 2 and a half hours, i was around people who love la salle just as much as i do. i had an afternoon of experiencing the lasallian animo. aaaah. uaap season is back.

thank you, Lord. i had an awesome day.

animo lasalle!

this little piggy went to the market.

2004-07-10T18:08:00.000+08:00

This Little Piggy Went To The Market.

currently listening to:your body is a wonderland/john mayer.

i think im going to *try* to turn vegetarian.

my sister and i were on the way to rockwell, and on the highway, we saw a truck crammed with pigs. it wasn't traffic at all, but my sister and i stayed behind the truck at a speed of 40kph, having some sort of somber silence for the poor piggies.

i swear, nakakaawa talaga. they were all super duper squished together, and you could see them all climbing on top of each other, gasping for room to breathe. imagine how uncomfortable it was for them to be so packed in like that under the scorching sun, bumpy ride and all--probably on the way to the butcher's shop.

the whole 5 minutes or so we were behind the truck was just so depressing. i actually almost cried. i even said out loud "goodbye, sinigang na baboy.".

sigh.

SAVE THE PIGS.

animo!!!

2004-07-08T21:32:00.000+08:00

current LSS:sleeping to dream/jason mraz.

araneta coliseum. cheers. face paint. daddy-daughter time. the color green. ateneo vs. la salle. human waves. drums.

UAAP season has begun.

God, i can't wait for Sunday. Animo La Salle!

duck.

2004-07-07T20:34:00.001+08:00

currently watching:O.C. episode 115.

yeah, yeah, the duck is back.

felt like a duck today eh, not a dog.

:)

2004-07-06T22:26:00.000+08:00

i heard this song again because tootsie wootsie was singing it. eyes closed pa. hahahahha. super duper nice song.

Artist: Shawn Colvin Lyrics
Song: Never Saw Blue Like That Lyrics

Today we took a walk up the street
And picked a flower and climbed the hill
Above the lake

And secret thoughts were said aloud
We watched the faces in the clouds
Until the clouds had blown away

And were we ever somewhere else
You know, it's hard to say

And I never saw blue like that before
Across the sky
Around the world
You've given me all you have and more
And no one else has ever shown me how
To see the world the way I see it now
Oh, I, I never saw blue like that

I can't believe a month ago
I was alone, I didn't know you
I hadn't seen or heard you're name
And even now, I'm so amazed
It's like a dream, It's like a rainbow, it's like the rain

And somethings are the way they are
And words just can't explain

Cause I never saw blue like that before
Across the sky
Around the world
You've given me all you have and more
And no one else has ever shown me how
To see the world the way I see it now
Oh, I, I never saw blue like that before

And it feels like now,
And it feels always,
And it feels like coming home

I never saw blue like that before
Across the sky
Around the world
You've given me all you have and more
And no one else has ever shown me how
To see the world the way I see it now
Oh, I, I never saw blue like that before

Oh, I, I never saw blue like that

empty.

2004-07-03T19:50:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:counting blue cars/dishwalla.
currently feeling:empty.

it's so depressing how people seem to get on with their lives without you.

i was looking through friendster profiles of old friends for about an hour, and it's sad realizing that your old friends have found so many new ones. you see testimonials written for your friends and you realize that you've missed such big parts of their lives, that you don't know 3/4 of the people they know, and that you weren't there with them to share so many other memories.

i know that it can't be helped. i myself have made a great number of good friends in college. but... what happened to all the old ones? do they just really slowly fade away like that? do time and distance just really lead to forgetting? because it's sad. i miss these people, and i do try to send occasional 'how ya doing?' texts, but seeing how no one really does the same, or don't reply to my messages just clinches it--everyone's moved on with their lives, and it just ends up pushing me further away from them.

that sucks.

2004-07-02T18:19:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:Into My Air/17:28.

ganked from an email from carvin.

---------------------------------------------------------------

Hinding-hindi ko makakalimutan ang mga mumunti ngunit ginintuang butil ng payo na nakuha ko sa aking mga magulang.

Kaya heto, aking ise-share sa inyo:

1. Si Inay, tinuruan niya ako HOW TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"Kung kayong dalawa ay magpapatayan, doon kayo sa labas! Mga leche kayo, kalilinis ko lang ng bahay."

2. Natuto ako ng RELIGION kay Itay.
"Kapag yang mantsa di natanggal sa carpet, magdasal ka na!"

3.Kay Inay ako natuto ng LOGIC.
"Kaya ganyan, dahil sinabi ko."

4. At kay Inay pa rin ako natuto MORE LOGIC.
"Kapag ikaw ay nalaglag diyan sa bubong, ako lang magisa ang manonood ng sine."

5. Si Inay din ang nagturo sa akin kung ano ang ibig sahibin ng IRONY.
"Sige ngumalngal ka pa at bibigyan talaga kita ng iiyakan mo!"

6. Si Inay ang nagpaliwanag sa akin kung ano ang CONTORTIONISM.
"Tingnan mo nga yang dumi sa likod ng leeg mo, tignan mo!!!"

7. Si Itay ang nagpaliwanag sa akin kung anong ibig sabihin ng STAMINA.
"Wag kang tatayo diyan hangga't di mo natatapos yang lahat ng pagkain mo!"

8. At si Inay ang nagturo sa amin kung ano ang WEATHER.
"Lintek talaga kayo, ! ano ba itong kuwarto nyong magkapatid, parang dinaanan ng bagyo!"

9. Ganito ang paliwanag sa akin ni Inay tungkol sa CIRCLE OF LIFE:
"Malandi kang bata ka, iniluwal kita sa mundong ito, maari rin kitang alisin sa mundong ito."

10. Kay Itay ako natuto kung ano ang BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Tumigil ka nga diyan! Huwag kang mag-inarte na parang Nanay mo!"

11. Si Inay naman ang nagturo kung anong ibig sabihin ng GENETICS.
"Nagmana ka ngang talaga sa ama mong walanghiya!"

12. Si Inay naman ang nagpaliwanag sa amin kung anong ibig sabihin ng ENVY.
"Maraming mga batang ulila sa magulang, di ba kayo nagpapasalamat at mayroon kayong magulang na tulad namin?"

13. Si Itay naman ang nagturo sa akin ng ANTICIPATION.
"Sige kang bata ka, hintayin mong makarating tayo sa bahay!"

14. At si Itay pa rin ang nagturo kay Kuya kung anong ibig sabihin ng RECEIVING.
"Uupakan kita pagdating natin sa bahay!"

15. Si Inay naman ang nagturo sa akin kung ano ang HUMOR.
"Kapag naputol yang mga paa mo ng pinaglalaruan mong lawnmower, wag na wag kang tatakbo sa akin at lulumpuhin kita!"

16. At ang pinakamahalaga sa lahat, natutunan ko kina Inay at Itay kung ano ang JUSTICE.
"Isang araw magkakaroon ka rin ng anak, tiyak maging katulad mo at magiging pasakit din sa ulo!"

the greatest story ever told.

2004-07-01T11:17:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:all kinds of time/fountains of wayne.

im 20. im waaaaaaaaay too young to be thinking about this. but if i ever find the right guy, and if im blessed enough for him to love me back... and if we ever DO get married.. i'd like this to be my 'wedding song'.

Artist: Oliver James
Song: Greatest Story Ever Told

Thank you for this moment
I've gotta say how beautiful you are
Of all the hopes and dreams I could have prayed for
Here you are

If I could have one dance forever
I would take you by the hand
Tonight it's you and I together
I'm so glad I'm your man

And if I lived a thousand years
You know I never could explain
The way I lost my heart to you that day
but if destiny decided I should look the other way
then the world would never know
the greatest story ever told
and did I tell you that I love you tonight

I don't hear the music
When I'm looking in your eyes
But I feel the rhythm of your body
Close to mine

It's the way we touch, it soothes me
It's the way we'll always be
your kiss, your pretty smile, you know i'd die for
oh baby
you're all i need

And if I lived a thousand years
You know I never could explain
The way I lost my heart to you that day
but if destiny decided I should look the other way
then the world would never know
the greatest story ever told
and did I tell you that I love you
just how much i really need you
did I tell you that I love you tonight

And if I lived a thousand years
You know I never could explain
The way I lost my heart to you that day
but if destiny decided I should look the other way
then the world would never know
the greatest story ever told
and did I tell you that I love you
just how much I really need you
did I tell you that I love you tonight

Ü.

2004-06-29T23:22:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:all i've got/17:28.

was home "sick" today. really. sick with a cough, cold, and slight fever. sick of doing schoolwork. sick of the strange weather. sick of being stuck in DLSU when it's raining cats and dogs. sick of being away from my bed.

yay. im going to school again tomorrow. whoopee.

hey.

2004-06-29T14:37:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:greatest story ever told/oliver james.

don't know what to blog about, but i wanted to blog. so there! :).

a day wasted.

2004-06-27T22:08:00.000+08:00

shayne, jackie, jc, jj, mel, donna and i stayed over at mel's house yesterday in hopes of finishing a paper to be submitted on monday, 9am.

to make a long story short, we all left mel's house at 6am. we worked for 14 hours. we didn't finish the paper. we aren't submitting it either. but hell, we had a LOT of fun and took a LOT of pictures.

the time i finally got home.

for more pictures, check out http://community.webshots.com/user/wenkgirl

2004-06-26T02:02:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:love song for no one/john mayer.

2am. have to wake up at 830. really should sleep now but..

im too in love with john mayer to shut him off.

***

Staying home alone on a Friday
Flat on the floor looking back
On old love
Or lack thereof
After all the crushes are faded
And all my wishful thinking was wrong
I'm jaded
I hate it

I'm tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
So tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
Get here

Searching all my days just to find you
I'm not sure who I'm looking for
I'll know it
When I see you
Until then, I'll hide in my bedroom
Staying up all night just to write
A love song for no one

I'm tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
So tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here

I could have met you in a sandbox
I could have passed you on the sidewalk
Could I have missed my chance
And watched you walk away?
oh no why

I could have met you in a sandbox
I could have passed you on the sidewalk
Could I have missed my chance
And watched you walk away?

I'm tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
I'm so tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
You'll be so good
You'll be so good for me

Oh i know you'll be so good
so good for me

hay.

2004-06-25T23:05:00.002+08:00

currently listening to:silence.

i had an unbelievably long day today.

slept at around 330ish, woke up at about 530ish. got stuck in traffic with karlo, sanjay, agnes, and gel for two freaking hours. one hour of it was just getting from buendia to taft. not fun. (well, maybe a little fun... Lisa Loeb kept us company! haha!)

since karlo, sanjay and gel were extremely late for their 800am class, (hehe, 9am na 'non!) we had breakfast nalang in tubbies. shempre i had a meeting at 9.. and i could have been on time... but breakfast muna diba?

walked to sj. walked to sps. walked to north conservatory to attend the meeting with jj, jackie, shayne, mel, mich, donna and jc. meeting adjourned an hour later.

walked to red ribbon (thanks for saving the day, rina!! HOY, i didnt eat here ah! hahahah.). walked to kodak. walked to UM. walked to aristo. walked to registrar's office. walked to the library.

stayed in the library for an hour, getting a cold from the horribly dusty books at the filipiniana section.

walked to sps. crammed requirements for green and white. ate lunch. cut class (for the nth time this week). had another 'meeting' with the same bunch. walked to yuchengco. walked to miguel. walked to UM. walked to LS.

class 'til 6. walked to yuchengco with jackie. walked to mcdo with dian. went home.

*typing that up, i suddenly realized that i did a LOT of walking today.

the question is...

bakit hindi ako pumapayat? =(

piiiiiiiiiiiiiicture.

2004-06-23T23:16:00.000+08:00

fine, im too lazy to type anything up. here's another picture. so sue me! =)

this is me and dad. aren't we cuuuuuuuuuute? hehe. he's my-one-and-only-ever-so-faithful-uaap-basketball-watching-partner.. and i wouldnt give that up for anything. love you pops! =).

ooooh!

2004-06-20T10:32:00.000+08:00

spot the difference! spot the difference!

meaning.

2004-06-16T23:01:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:nothing.

Who comes to your mind first?

Do you have any idea of who means the most to
you? There was this man who loved two women at
the same time but he didn't know which one he
loved more. Someone taught him. Ask Yourself
this question and answer it honestly:

"When you are happy, which person would you want
to share your happiness with?" The one you'll
think of is someone you love.
Ask yourself another question and answer it
honestly: "When you are sad, who is the person
to whom you want to share your burden with?" The
one you'll think of is also someone you love.

If you think of the same person when you are
happy and sad, that's the most perfect. But if
you don't think of the same person, I would
advise you to choose the one you are willing to
share your sadness with.

In life, there are more sorrows than happiness.
There are too many people whom you can share
your happiness with, not necessarily your lover.
If you live your life happily, you can also
enjoy it alone. In sadness, however, there are
not many people willing to share your burden
with you.

If you are willing to tell someone of your
happiness, I am sure that person has got to be
someone close and an understanding person to
you. But it shouldn't stop there. If that person
only thinks of you when he/she is happy, but
looks for someone else when he/she is sad, this
lover is too unstable, he/she doesn't treat you
as someone he/she can spend the rest of his/her
life with.

Of course, I will be very happy if I am the
first person to share his/her happiness. But, if
he/she is sad, I will be too willing to stay by
his/her side and ease his/her pain. Only then,
will I believe that I hold a very important
position in his/her heart.

If you are sad, who comes to your mind first?

damn.

2004-06-16T12:24:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:my stupid mouth/john mayer.

i love college. im on my 4th year, and i've learned so much (NOT from class though, hehe). i've met sooooo many wonderful people who are all such a big part of my life now.

but today, i feel sad about being at this stage in my life. i feel bad because my high school friends seem to be missing. my bestest friend in the whole world seems to be so far away, and conversations are scarce. the one person who knew everything about my childhood, about my zobel life--knows diddlysquat about what ive been through--the pain ive been going through the past few months. the past few years. sure, i try to keep in touch--but it's like all the earthly forces (like her boyfriend, organizations and the distance between us) are keeping us away.

it makes me think--if things like guys and school can radically change the quality of our friendship.. then was there even quality in the first place? i suppose not. i feel like we just labeled ourselves 'best friends' when in fact.. we're not.

that's a sad thought.

position for wenk's best friend is now open. all applications accepted.

icasases.

2004-06-12T14:10:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:all i've got/1728.

im the 'sentimental family shmuck' amongst us.

as a kid, i always complained when one of the siblings couldn't go to a routine event like having lunch at my grandfather's house on sundays. when my eldest brother, vic, was getting married, i begged and whined for us to have one last 'icasas outing' as the 7 of us (but yes, cyn, you know i love you!). i store hidden anger when we have family trips and someone can't make it--for no matter what reason. it's so freaking hard to get this entire family of 8 under one roof at the same time, even for just a couple of minutes... but man, those minutes--i live for.

everyone's growing up. im the last icasas child still studying. i know that everyone's getting older because pj now works, both pauline and carolyn are mere years away from getting married, vic and cyn have bought their first real house, my mom is starting to wonder (out loud) if the two other girls will be getting married soon, and my dad is nearing retirement--probably so that he can play golf for the rest of his life.

even though i always complain about everything that life has to offer, i know that i'm a very lucky girl. my family is still complete, and we are all perfectly healthy. no matter what happens in this world, im sure to have this group of unbelievably funny, loving and talented people by my side. the best part is that these people happen to be my family. for that reason, i know for sure--that i am blessed.

i love my family, i really, really do.

so Lord, thank you for letting me be an icasas.

kristine.

2004-06-10T21:05:00.002+08:00

currently listening to:all i want is you/u2.

K	Kinky
R	Rare
I	Inspirational
S	Sexy
T	Tough
I	Intelligent
N	Noisy
E	Energetic

Name Acronym Generator
From Go-Quiz.com

-------------------------

yogi: energetic, with or without coke?
kris: hehehe
yogi: yours and patty's are accurate ah.
kris: Young Outrageous Grungy Important
kris: hehehehehe
yogi: grungy?
kris: kinky?!
yogi: hey, maybe with someone special you are. it's not bad you know
yogi: depends lang sa time, place, and kanino
kris: =0)
yogi: what's grungy?
kris: mahilig sa grunge?
yogi: hahahahahaha
yogi: teka san na ba dictionary ko
kris: look up kinky na rin! hehehe!
yogi: grungy- messy
kris: kinky?
yogi: kinky- tightly curled; weird =); sexually abnormal
kris: are you serious?! hahahahah!
yogi: so it's true!!
kris: am i noisy?=(
yogi: you are
kris: gee, thanks.
yogi: pero in a cheerful way
yogi: hindi yung madaldal
kris: so im cheerfully noisy? uuuhh...

can you say doggy?

2004-06-10T12:46:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:crazy for you/sponge cola.

new layout! new layout! hehehehe.

wednesday.

2004-06-09T21:28:00.000+08:00

currently listening to: counting blue cars / dishwalla.

last night, i got two signs from God that there are reasons to smile. thanks so much to gisella and yanee for being those signs. you girls were exactly what i needed =).

i had brunch with chesca today at pancake house. it was so nice seeing an old face (haha, youre not old ches) after such a long time! the last time i saw my barkada as a whole was... christmas! (and we werent even really complete, *points accusingly at yanee*).

anyway, life is back to normal. even in terms of school--im back to being lazy. was late to my first class, didnt listen in my second class and cut my third class.. hehe. =). it's nice smiling again. although i don't know how much my body can take drinking water, iced tea and juice. God, i need a coke.

a smile.

2004-06-08T20:12:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:my kind of girl/brian mcknight.
currently reading:the dim sum of all things/kim wong keltner.

i have once again learned to look at the brighter side of life.

for those who have been following my mood the entire week--i've been horribly depressed. i was cursing guys and their existence, ive given up coke in hopes that God will feel sorry for me and hand me my soulmate.

now, i still think guys are horribly insensitive jerks (but NICE ones! hehe.), and i am on day 9 of my cokeless life. i am still hoping God feels pity on me and drops my soulmate on my lap. however, i do everything with a smile on my face instead of feeling sorry for myself.

i wanna say thanks to everyone who either helped me through this face or at least TRIED to cheer me up ;). thanks to ana banana, earl, aaron, melai, pia, jackie, mel, ces, beans, dez, and people who took the time to just read my blog... (even if most of you dont comment! hmph!). thanks guys, you're the reasons for living. naks. hehe.

dont frown--you never know when someone's falling in love with your smile ;).

(hahahah, i used to love that quote, now its just plain cheezy. ewwww.)

my, oh my.

2004-06-06T21:27:00.000+08:00

currently watching:the O.C., episode 5.

believe it or not, i have not had a DROP of coke in exactly 7 (yes, SEVEN) days. it's hard, definitely--and ive found myself avoiding eating at fast food places (especially mcdo 'coz they have the best coke!).

i hope i lose weight from doing this. para naman may kwenta ginagawa ko. if not, i offer up my sacrifice to God---sana ma-meet ko soulmate ko. health doesnt matter. soulmate nalang, Lord. =).

blank.

2004-06-05T02:36:00.000+08:00

currently listening to: nothing.

my gas tank is running on empty. and no one can save me.

comfortable.

2004-06-03T12:04:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:comfortable/john mayer.

*this isnt one of john mayer's well-known songs, but i heard it recently, and it's now one of my favorites.

------------------------

I just remembered, that time at the market
snuck up behind me and jumped on my shopping cart
And rode down, isle 5
you looked behind you to smile back at me
crashed into a rack full of magazines
they asked us, if we could leave.

Can't remember, what went wrong last September
though i'm sure you'd remind me, if you had to

Our love was, comfortable and
so broken in

I sleep with this new girl i'm still getting used to
my friends all approve, say 'shes gonna be good for you'
they throw me, high fives

She says the bible is all that she reads
and prefers that I not use profanity
your mouth was, so dirty

Life of the party
and she swears that she's artsy
but you could distinguish
Miles from Coltrane

Our love was, comfortable and
so broken in
she's perfect, so flawless
or so they say, say

She thinks I can't see the smile that shes faking
and poses for pictures that aren't being taken
I loved you
grey sweat pants, no makeup, so perfect

Our love was, comfortable and
so broken in
she's perfect, so flawless
I'm not impressed, I want you back.

fasting.

2004-06-02T20:21:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:my dad snoring.

coke is my life. i can have it for breakfast, on an empty stomach, to satisfy my hunger. coke doesn't keep me awake--in fact, it calms me. coke is my secret to being happy.

it's been 2 whole days since my body has had a dose of coke. how much further can i go? without coke, i feel myself getting tired, feel myself getting unhappier. life doesnt seem so great without coke in it.

or maybe my life just isnt going great at all.

no one's friend.

2004-06-01T21:53:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:colorblind/counting crows.

if i were to classify myself as the kind of friend people perceive me to be, i might as well just drown myself in the ocean.

*im the friend who you go to when you're getting over your girlfriend and need a night out. then im forgotten until the next low point in your life.

*im the friend who you call when you're lonely because your girlfriend is either not home or busy doing something as of the moment. then you deny talking to me because she might get mad.

*im the friend you contact when your 'real friends' aren't home. then you'll pretend na i contacted you para mukhang hinahabol pa kita.

*im the friend who you run to when you need a favor, possibly from one of my siblings or from my parents. i get a thank you, then that's it.

*im the friend you text a 'hi, i miss you!' to, so you can feel good about still maintaining the friendship. then i wait for another month or so for your next message.

*im the friend you can make fun of, so you can feel good about yourself. or just so that you have something to do.

*im the friend you can talk to when you're sitting alone in school or at the mall, and make me stay with you so you wont look like a loner.

*im the friend who you contact out of the blue when you need someone else's phone number, need to borrow a book, or some other kind of favor.

if this is my only role in life, please, just shoot me now.

ugh.

2004-05-30T23:56:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:love song for no one/john mayer.

guys suck. they really do. silly little me...

the way pa they pretend na nothing ever happened. the way they innocently think na wala silang ginawa. the way they dont seem to notice na the girl is in bits and pieces. alam mo yun?

basta.

anyway, let me depress myself.

------

Behind the noisy laughter,
Behind the happy smile,
My heart wants to weep and weep
Even for just a while.

It sucks being me tonight..
tomorrow, the day after that.
Im ugly, im mean, im evil, im rude,
Not to mention im getting fat.

Im smiling on the outside
But on the inside, you should see
The darkness, the loneliness,
My soul and heart running empty.

I feel so disappointed
In people ive liked and loved for years
It seems like the world is letting me down
And i have no one to share my tears.

Here i am, typing this shit
Trying to think of words that rhyme
I guess this kinda describes me,
Im just a waste of time.

------

nuninoo...

2004-05-30T13:30:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:the whirring of F4 (F1 pala!) cars =)

i want a new layout. im getting a bit sick of the duckie. or should i keep it? watchu think? any suggestions for a place to get new templates? =)

friday night at last.

2004-05-28T19:55:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:falling/keahiwai.
currently reading:the 5 people you meet in heaven/mitch albom.

finally, the week has ended. my body hasnt adjusted to the waking up early *haha, 230pm class from tuesdays to fridays is early?! heeeey, i DO have 9am class on mondays! that's reeeeeally early!* =), and my body is once again getting a daily dose of taft avenue fast food. aaaah, mcdonald's coke. kfc gravy. once again, i am seeing my beloved blockmates everyday. i see faces of people who i dont know all that well, but i love smiling at and making small talk with. i keep my mind occupied with school-related things (like buying a new pen! and what new stabilo color to use for the term!), and in the process, get to block out the evilness of the world and the emptiness of life.

school is my heaven. if only i didnt have to study.

kitty cat dance.9

2004-05-27T00:22:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:cats! im a kitty cat!

did you get addicted to badger badger badger? (see a couple of posts down). well.. here's a new one for you cat lovers :P

http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/kittycat.php

kristine's drama special, year 20.

2004-05-24T21:54:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:all i want is you/U2.

first day of classes again today.

blahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblah.

ive lost my will to live.

denial and a smile.

2004-05-23T22:36:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:rainbow/southborder.

summer is over?! noooo! nooooo! it cant be!!! it just started! i havent done anything all summer! i havent lost weight! i havent gone to the beach! i havent seen all my friends yet! nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!

:(

----------------------------------------------

on a not-at-all-related-note:

a picture my brother took of my yesterday. hehe.

sentimental shit.

2004-05-23T15:28:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:flavor of the week.

what i'm about to post is kinda long. it's something my sister sent me through email about a billion years ago, but i found again somehow. i reread it, and i still think this is one of the nicest thoughts one could ever think (eh?). read on if you're bored.

----------

Falling In Love
From the book " Letters to my Son "
By Kent Nerburn

It is a mystery when we fall in love.

It is a mystery how it happens. It is a mystery when it comes. It is a mystery why some love grows and it is a mystery why some love fails.You can analyze this mystery and look for reasons and causes , but you will never do anymore than take the life out of the experience. Just as life itself is more than the sum of the bones and muscles and electrical impulses in the body , love is more than the sum of the interests and attractions and commonalities that two people share. And just as life itself is a gift that come and goes in its own time , so too , the coming of love must be taken as an unfathomable gift that cannot be questioned in its ways.

Sometimes , hopefully at least once in your life---the gift of love will come to you in full flower , and you will take hold of it celebrate it in all inexpressible beauty. This is the dream we all share. More often , it will come and take hold of you , celebrate you for a brief moment , then move on.

When this happens to young people , they too often try to grasp the love and hold it to them , refusing to see that it is a gift that is freely given and a gift that just as freely , moves away. When they fall out of love , or the person they love feels the spirit of love leaving , they try desperately to reclaim the love that is lost rather than accepting the gift for what it was , then moving on.

They want answers when there are no answers. They want to know what is wrong in them that makes the other person no longer love them , or they try to get their lover to change , thinking that if some small things were different , love would bloom again. They blame their circumstances and say that if they go far away and start a new life together , their love will grow.

They try anything to give meaning to what has happened. But there is no meaning beyond the love itself , and until they accept its own mysterious ways , they live in a sea of misery.

You need to know this about love , and to accept it. You need to treat what it brings you with kindness. If you find yourself in love with someone who does not love you , be gentle with yourself. There is nothing wrong with you. Love just didn't choose to rest in the other person's heart.

If you find someone else in love with you and you don't love him , feel honored that love came and called at your door , but gently refuse the gift you cannot return. Do not take advantage ; do not cause pain. How you deal with love is how you deal with you , and all our hearts feel the same pains and joys , even if our lives and ways are different.

If you fall in love with another , and he falls in love with you , and then love chooses to leave , do not try to reclaim it or to assess blame. Let it go. There is a reason and there is a meaning. You will know in time.

Remember that you don't choose love. Love chooses you. All you can really do is accept for all its mystery when it comes into your life. Feel the way it fills you to overflowing , then reach out and give it away. Give it back to the person who brought it alive in you. Give it to others who deem it poor in spirit. Give it to the world around you in any way you can.

There is where many lovers go wrong. Having been so long without love , they understand love is only a need. They see their hearts as empty places that will be filled by love , and they beginto look at love as something that flows to them rather than from then.

The first blush of new love is filled to overflowing , but as their love cools , they revert to seeing their love as a need. They cease to be someone who generates love and instead become someone who seeks love. They forget that the secret of love is that it is a gift , and that it can be made to grow only by giving it away.

Remember this , and keep it to your heart. Love has its own time , its own seasons , and its own reason for coming and going. You cannot bribe it or coerce it , or reason it into saying. You can only embrace it when it arrives and give it away when it comes to you. But if it chooses to leave from your heart of from the heart of your lover , there is nothing you can do and there is nothing you should do.

Love always has been and always will be a mystery. Be glad that it came to live for a moment in your life. IF YOU KEEP YOUR HEART OPEN IT WILL COME AGAIN.

krista.

2004-05-22T15:05:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:the sound of the floor polisher.

What Name Should You Have? by Lauren

not bad considering my real name is kristine. that means im pretty damn near who i should be. hehe, labo ba?.

lovingly yours,
krista.
ay, kristine pala.

up and quacking.

2004-05-22T00:57:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:some sad song on the radio.

i have a new layout! i have a new layout! (can you hear the excitement in my voice?)

hehe, this is the layout i was trying to fix the coding of for an unbelievable number of hours last night, when it suddenly dawned on me a couple of minutes ago that the answer was simple: do not upload your pictures on geocities or angelfire! *duh*.

will add a tag board blah blah blah some other time. for now, im just happy that my ducky layout is up and quacking.

and congrats to yogi and paul for starting their new blog!

new look / my day.

2004-05-20T23:26:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:in my place/coldplay.

okay, updated the look of my blog. i really, really wanted a template from BlogFrocks, but i (and 3 other people, hehe) couldnt figure out the code, so here i am with this very... plain layout =).

anyway, i have a counter (yay!) and a new comments box from HaloScan. I was adding a tagboard but i got lazy--maybe tomorrow =).

please do baptize my new comments box, and since i had to reset the counter.. i need visitors!!! refresh refresh refresh! hehehe =).

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

on another note, i was still sick today, but that didnt stop me from playing billiards, going bowling, and having a japanese dinner with ana, aaron and chard at Palm's Country Club.

this is what i learned about:

billiards: i SUCK.
bowling: i do well during the first two games.. but when you get to the FOURTH game, you start letting your friends take your turns for you.
japanese food: you can never have enough.

thus ends my day.

3 more days of summer left.

cough. sniffle. achoo!

2004-05-20T01:51:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:the reason/hoobastank.
currently feeling: sick.

what a way to spend my last few days of summer--stuck at home, stuck in bed. sick =(.

well, not exactly, it was quite eventful asides from my sniffles and coughs. i chatted and neopetted (as usual), did stuff for my mom, then went to the mall with brian to buy a birthday gift for cyn (thanks bri!). after a looooooong 5-hour power nap (hehe), had dinner with the family at minggoy's. it was quite interesting that we were the ONLY customers in the entire restaurant. hehehe.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CYN!!! =)

rainy day blahs.

2004-05-17T22:35:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:the whirring of the electric fan.
currently reading:myself type.

last night (aka this morning), i slept at nearly 5 in the morning. i woke up at 1 in the afternoon only to find out that it was still unblievably dark. for the first time in months, it was raining cats and dogs. it was refreshing to feel the coolness of the air, knowing that today wouldnt be one of those days that i would gross myself out by how sticky my own sweat could make me. also, i love the smell of rain. it's smells so... green =)

my day was pretty useless actually. i finished off the remainders of a strawberry shortcake slice that i had been hiding in the refrigerator. i also watched a dvd of 'school or rock' and thoroughly enjoyed it. i then spent countless hours online playing neopets and chatting with some friends whom i see all the time. i take a break from all this 'activity' to polish off a bag of chips along with a can of coke. an hour later, dinnertime with some of the siblings arrive and i have two platefulls of food.

it was pretty funny that dinner was interrupted for a couple of minutes because we (vic, cyn, pj & i)ran for cover when we saw a huge moth flying around the room. (fine, only vic and i ran, HAHA). thanks to pj and cyn for saving the meal.

of course, more internetting comes after dinner.

and now i post this blog and get ready for bed.

it seems lazy i know. i turned down an offer to play badminton with my mom today. i turned down an offer to go to the ruins today to buy some dvds for my mom. i turned down an offer to go out with some friends. i am a lazy bum and i know it.

and i love it.

the results of a boring day.

2004-05-14T23:35:00.000+08:00

currently listening to:my stupid mouth/john mayer.
currently feeling:blech.

1) i have a photoblog! (or whatever you call somewhere you store your pictures in!)

i uploaded all recent pictures taken with the digital camera at:

http://gallery64876.fotopic.net,

where i expect you to visit... and comment of course! =) it took me a billion years to categorize everything and blah blah blah. ugh.

2) i found vic and myself saying "badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger MUSHROOM MUSHROOM badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger MUSHROOM MUSHROOM badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger..."

why?

visit THIS site and find out!!!

troy-ness.

2004-05-14T01:31:00.000+08:00

(no spoilers, i promise!)
oh my god.

ive seen many good movies in my lifetime.. but TROY is definitely somewhere on the very top of my listÜ. my friend and i agreed that it's just as good as LOTR--only without the mutated creatures, heheÜ.

just how gwapo can the cast get? hello!? orlando bloom, eric bana AND brad pitt?! youve GOT to be kidding. even diane kruger made me drool, hehe! ;)

three hours was NOT enough.

i pity the janitor who has to mop the drool all over the cinema floor.

the first post.

2004-05-13T11:04:00.000+08:00

ive got three blogs, but ive got my reasons.. (for two of them at least). one is for my family and random visitors (fine, no one visits it anymore!), my second is for my friends at neopets and my third.. is just useless. after making accounts at tblog, livejournal and tabulas, let's see if this one will actually last more than one post, unlike my tabula account, hehe.

but..but...blogspot looks so cool! hehehe. my brother and his wife have their own blogs at blogspot... and it IS pretty userfriendly... and the templates are so nice...and...

let's see if i get visitors.. then i'll stay. *hint*hint* :)